I have no words to express what I am feeling. It has taken my breath away completely, Not having an air in my home at degrees doesn't help. I am pleading desperately with all I have in my soul to lighten my cross. I am sinner and I believe that God has forgiven me completely. I believe this that I am enduring started in my childhood. Never good enough, a bother an object that could be kicked , pushed , hit, at any given time. I was an object of self destruction. Until I grew up and felt I could change my life. I believed I was doing good until the same abuse came a second time with my marriage. How could people live with hatred in their hearts. I don't know. All I know is that it makes them feel superior and Big for their sorrowful Self's. I don't believe that anything related to God is hate. I have been a victim in the wrong family. Can you please help me. I need prayers for my 2 son's that have taken it to an extent of repeating that hate in their hearts for the wrong person. Again I am here to endure all the fault , the responsibility, and torture. When the realization is not yet met. Everything that happens has been my fault nothing is theirs. God how can that be. How! I will take responsibility for what I have done Why can't they take their own responsibility and quit laying it on the one person that has never failed them. I failed myself with allowing me the abuse going forward even by them. I need your Help God I can't be at fault for everyone in this family. Please help . Amen